Willy Wonka and the Three Clever Boys

Willy Wonka and the Three Clever-Boys is the 12th episode in the series.

Plot synopsis
Bob begins along on the countertop as in the base episode, when suddenly, Larry enters the scene showing off his new hat, an oven mitt. Since Bob praised the hat to a lesser degree than what Larry anticipated, Larry is deeply offended. On this basis of Larry's feelings of being offended alone, Bob is arrested, incarcerated, and returns the countertop a year later, long enough for Larry to forget what Bob did to Larry to begin with. Bob's first act after coming back from imprisonment is to use the airtime in Abridged to show a movie, causing Larry to say he likes movies except for action, comedies, dramas, and "anything else that involves moving pictures." Larry realizes that means he does not like movies, but he decides he is willing to watch one anyway, despite (still) wearing an oven mitt that covers his eyes completely. It then dawns on Larry that Bob was actually sentenced to five years in prison, to which end Bob informs Larry that he is on the run. Larry agrees not to tell the authorities Bob's whereabouts.

The movie Bob puts on is narrated by George while he is simultaneously in it. The story starts right as George is about to approve a morning delivery for a factory where he works. Instead of a deliveryman named Henry, who George considers to be cool, Laura Carrot delivers the shipment. George notes to the audience and Laura herself that she sounds noticeably different from last episode, as then she sounded like a gruff man but now sounds like a polite little girl. It seems however that his method of demonstrating the differences, a recording, non-diegetic music included, from the previous episode and his second continuity reference that episode, was more than anything a way for George to impress the audience and overcompensate for his insecurities.

Laura completes the shipment on top of a tower, frustrating Mr. Lunt for being late again. While Laura is singing like she did in the base episode, Mr. Lunt speaks all his lines in his regular voice, because he does not like singing, and he does not like Laura, who he plans to throw into the furnace. Before he descends into the factory via elevator, Mr. Lunt tells Laura to say her goodbyes unless they can find a substitute. While on his way down, Mr. Lunt is asked his opinion on the "new hat" a pea working at the factory has donned, which is actually an anvil. Mr. Lunt simply says it looks great and continues his descent.

George tells the audience that the events in the previous two paragraphs were filler, and that he would like to tell them how US President Carter, Luann Loud from The Loud House, a Skeksi from The Dark Crystal, and the titular characters of Fat Albert and "Dilbert" team up to stop Sportacus from LazyTown from turning everyone in the world into protein shakes, but is informed the crew of Abridged cannot afford the rights to the story. Instead, George tells the story of Billy Bob, Billy Jim, and Billy III, whose boss is Willy Wonka (played by Mr. Nezzer, who George thinks is unstable, since the Abridged team could not get Gene Wilder or Johnny Depp either). After Wonka makes an "important announcement" that consists of telling everyone in the audience, "Bye," the laborers get bored and start debating whether they should eat the chocolate in the factory or Laura. Since Laura claims she has carbs (despite being a carrot), they decide to eat all of the chocolate

In the office, Wonka is in shock over the amount and varieties of chocolate his employees are eating, including one which Wonka passes off as made from boiled oompa-loompas. Lunt then states that the oompa-loompas ran away because they were not being fed and asks if the zucchini in front of him is actually Mr. Wonka. "Wonka" then states he is Wonka as well as Batman, Iron, Jerry Seinfeld, and Joey Tribiani from Friends. Mr. Lunt and Mr. Wonka check on the workers more directly and see all of them dead except for the Billies, which they believe to be zombies, before Billy Bob corrects them and Billy Jim tells them the other will come back to life in several minutes. Wonka decides to give them a promotion only because they did not die, but they refuse. They settle on wearing hats and ties, which Wonka likes for reasons he refuses to disclose.

George lets the audience in on the revelation that Wonka is mentally unwell because he does not spend time around the people surrounding him; through this, George implies he would not squander the opportunity of being surrounded by others. Wonka summons the Billies to his office the next day to discuss his "message." After making Billy III feel uncomfortable by touching him and Billy III trying to initiate some conversation about potato chip flavors, Wonka decides to sing his "message," first by singing "Prince Ali" from Aladdin, then "Augustus Gloop" from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Mr. Lunt knowingly speaks gibberish to successfully remind Wonka of the song that he actually needed to sing, which seriously concerns Lunt. Accompanied by noticeably sloppy piano music, Wonka sings off-key and off-beat a song he wrote himself centered on his distaste towards pickles, which either rhymes with "pickle(s)" on every line or does not rhyme to begin with. When asked their opinion, the three boys critique the song, due to its nonsensical lyrics that are so bad they hurt Billy III's nostrils.

Wonka in retaliation sends his imaginary guards, causing the boys to run until Laura lets them get away in her flying delivery truck while Larry sings incessantly.

A planned Silly Song is aborted because Bob was under the misconception that Larry speaks Spanish.

Possibly in reaction to Larry's singing, Laura decides to turn the others in. With their demise impending, the three boys still tell Wonka how much they hate his song, which Wonka still does not accept, causing him to throw them into a furnace alive.

Larry at the end tells the children that when a large man insists he is Willy Wonka and Joey Tribbiani at the same time and sings about his hatred of pickles, that they should not acknowledge the lunatic but instead discuss with their friends some other topic, such as steamed cabbage. Anyone who does not like steamed cabbage, according to Larry, is evil and deserves to watch The Cat in the Hat while strapped into a chair with liquorish in a rocket on a course to Neptune, a planet that, as far as Larry knows, is uninhabited. He further advises children to buy gold, to watch Gravity Falls but watch Dave the Barbarian more often, and to run away from Sportacus, who, as mentioned earlier, is trying to turn the world into protein shakes.

Appearances

 * George
 * Mr. Nezzer (as Willy Wonka et. al.)
 * Larry (as himself and Billy III)
 * Bob (as himself and Billy Bob)
 * Junior (as Billy Jim)
 * Laura
 * Mr. Lunt

Notes & trivia

 * This episode was released instead of the 11th episode due to production hell.
 * When Mr. Nezzer is about to sing his song, he mistakenly sings "Prince Ali" from Disney's 1992 film Aladdin, and "Augustus Gloop" from the 2005 film adaptation of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, before being reminded by Mr. Lunt what the song really is.
 * This is the only episode rendered in 360p.